Addiction Recovery Benefits

ADDICTION RECOVERY IS ASSOCIATED WITH DRAMATIC IMPROVEMENTS IN ALL AREAS OF LIFE
• Involvement in illegal acts and involvement with the criminal justice system (e.g., arrests, incarceration, DWIs) decreases by about ten-fold
• Steady employment in addiction recovery increases by over 50% greater relative to active addiction
• Frequent use of costly Emergency Room departments decreases ten-fold
• Paying bills on time and paying back personal debt doubles
• Planning for the future (e.g., saving for retirement) increases nearly three-fold
• Involvement in domestic violence (as victim or perpetrator) decreases dramatically
• Participation in family activities increases by 50%
• Volunteering in the community increases nearly three-fold compared to in active addiction
• Voting increases significantly
• Reports of untreated emotional/mental health problems decrease over four-fold
• Twice as many participants further their education or training than in active addiction
THE BENEFITS OF ADDICTION RECOVERY OVER TIME
• The percentage of people owing back taxes decreases as recovery gets longer while a greater number of people in longer recovery report paying taxes, having good credit, making financial plans for the future and paying back debts
• Civic involvement increases dramatically as recovery progresses in such areas as voting and volunteering in the community
• People increasingly engage in healthy behaviors such as taking care of their health, having a healthy diet, getting regular exercise and dental checkups, as recovery progresses
• As recovery duration increases, a greater number of people go back to school or get additional job training
• Rates of steady employment increase gradually as recovery duration increases
• More and more people start their own business as recovery duration increases
• Participation in family activities increases from 68% to 95%

Results of study conducted by Faces & Voices of Recovery: http://www.facesandvoicesofrecovery.org/publications/life_in_recovery_survey.php

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Be Yourself

Who you are as an individual is no accident. An Infinite Being with extreme precision designed you. You are you, because you were meant to be that way. You can’t escape it, and if you try, you will be both unhappy and fall short of your potential.

Recently I pondered what was the most important thing for me to share with my children and grand children. I was meditating/praying for an answer. “What is it, that you, my Higher Power, want me to say to my kids?”

The answer was “Be yourself.” That’s what they need to hear from me.
So much of life is spent acting or pretending to be something you aren’t.
Society pushes and pulls us in so many directions that don’t feel right. But we go with the flow. We don’t want to stick out. We don’t want to seem out of it. We want to be part of the “in” crowd. We want to achieve success and things, no matter the sacrifice to our soul.
How do we instruct them to find this inner peace? Where is his acceptance of a Higher Power and the fortitude to follow the passion of their life with peace and love?

The message I received was to find a place to seclude myself in order to find me? Unless the seclusion causes me emotional/psychological problems, it will help me find peace. Seclusion is one of the most powerful tools for spiritual growth, and was used throughout history by prophets, kabbalists and holy people. To make sure you’re using the tool correctly, it’s good to have a mentor for this type of activity.

If you find it difficult to get away, you can make a space in your home for seclusion and introspection, meditation and prayer. But ultimately, the goal is to live amongst society, while retaining your integrity.

It is true that isolation is detrimental, and I am not saying that we should remove ourselves from our community or fellowship. We need to be apart of the lives of others. We cannot remain reclusive. We must go out into the world and make it a better place. But we can only do so if we have perfected the individual God created us to be.

Practice your trumpet alone in a room, away from others. When you have perfected your instrument and found your own music, come to the band, share what you have to offer, and join the holy orchestra.

Spend time this week meditating on the thought: Be yourself. Try to discover ways to make yourself more of the real you.

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Pilgrimage: Life On Life’s Terms

From: The Spirituality of Imperfection

The spiritual masters understood that life on life’s terms begins with the acceptance of the fact that one is not in control; it involves a flexible attitude of life’s uncertainties, a mistrust of the rigidities of certainty. We never know where the vicissitudes of our pilgrimage will take us. The pilgrimage of our spiritual journeys is one of “progress not perfection”.

This 14th century story tells it well:

Imagine yourself an adolescent shepherd in a tiny English village, in Sussex. Each day you take your flock to the hills, where you lie on your back, searching out images in the cloud formations, one ear always cocked for sounds of possible danger.

One afternoon, you return to find your village astir with anticipation. A stranger has arrived, a pilgrim returning from the great shrine at Canterbury. In exchange for a meal and a night’s lodging, the stranger will sit at the village fire that evening and tell the tale of his travels. Eagerly, you join in the preparations. At the supper, you are so anxious to hear the pilgrim’s story that you gulp rather than savor the rare rich meal. Ages seem to pass before everyone is finished eating, and the site is tidied. As the villagers settle in to hear the traveler’s tale, you scramble to gain a place near the front so that you can see and follow the expressions on his face.

The stranger begins, recounting both the perils and the happy coincidences of his journey, describing his fellow pilgrims, and finally detailing the magnificence of the great shrine of Canterbury and the wonders to be beheld there. You hang on every word, picturing every nuance of his story in your imagination. Long after the story is over and you lie abed in your hut, your mind leaps into those pictures, trying to make the stranger’s adventures a part of your own life. The next day, as you return to the hillside with your Bock, you see in the clouds the shapes described by the storyteller, and you long to make a similar pilgrimage. But that is impossible. Young shepherds whose work is needed to help sustain their families do not make pilgrimages.
Several months later, a sheep-plague strikes the area, and most of the villagers’ sheep die. You soon realize that you have become more a liability than an asset to your family and that for their sake as well as your own, you must make your way to the great city of London, perhaps to learn some new skill, at least to find a way of living.

But you need not go to the city directly or at once. Indeed, for your spiritual welfare as well as to ask God’s blessings on your ambitions, you decide to journey by way of Canterbury, finally making the long-dreamed of pilgrimage. But how to get there?

There are no maps; only barons and their knights have those. Still, you do not worry, for starting out is simple: There is but one road through your village, and you know the direction from which the stranger came.
You also know the habits of pilgrims–how your stranger had stopped in a similar way the evening before arriving in your village. After a day’s journey, you might be fortunate enough to stop where he had stopped, and there you might find someone who can point you in the right direction for the next leg of your own pilgrimage. And so you set off, not knowing exactly where you are going nor exactly how to get there, but hoping to find on the way others who are interested in the same quest and who can help to guide your own.

And, of course, you do. Travelers are rare in that age, and strangers rarely meet except when traveling. The people you meet thus answer the question; “Who are you?” by detailing, “how I come to be here.” Each person who joins the quest tells how she heard of the goal and what he knows of it. In the process of telling the stories of their lives, the pilgrims band together, pooling their knowledge about the journey, merging bits of wisdom remembered from the stories told by others who had made the same journey. “The route through that wood is attacked by robbers.” “The rockier trail is the best way around the hill.” “After a rain, that stream can be forded only above its rapids.” In less stressful moments, the journeyers share expectations and hopes: “I heard that a man with a leg more crippled than mine was cured.” “When the procession of the Sacrament begins, it is as if the angels were singing.” “Even lawyers have become humble when standing at that altar.”

Thus it is that, on the way, you learn more not only about the goal you are seeking-the Canterbury of Becket, who preferred the risk of a king’s wrath to the risk of God’s judgment -but also about yourself as the seeker of that goal. What risks are you willing to take? Which do you refuse? What kinds of people have hopes such as your own? Who would you like to be like? Whose help do you accept? Whose do you still suspect?

And, of course, the paramount discovery gradually dawns as the pilgrimage continues–the realization that the ultimate goal you seek is not some reality “out there,” but the awakening of an identity that lies within.

The pilgrimage image suggests that the goal of this particular journey known as life is not to prove that we are perfect but to find some happiness, some joyful peace of mind in the reality of or our own imperfection.

“If I am not farther along than I was yesterday, something’s wrong with me,” the pilgrim thinks, I’m in a different place than I was yesterday, and isn’t this interesting?”

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God’s Will

We use the words “God’s Will” often in recovery, in prayer or as an explanation of events. It is an integral part of our transformation, our acceptance of a “Power Greater than Ourselves”, that we are willing to subjugate to in order to have a more peaceful and meaningful life. We use it to explain relationship issues, the occurrences of unfortunate or often horrendous events to others and ourselves.

We hear it about everything in our life that we do not have control over, and we feel it is necessary to stay in recovery. But is “God’s Will” really about the individual mundane happenings in our lives, or is it about how we handle them? It says in The Promises that, “We will intuitively know how to handle situations that used to baffle us.” It doesn’t say situations will no longer occur that will baffle us, nor does it say that we will have financial security, or that we will no longer be selfish.

It is my belief that my recovery is about learning to trust “God’s Will” as an action on my part, not as a bystander to an act over which I haven’t any control. That if the choices I make are consequently positive to this circumstance in my life then I will stay on a path of serenity and enjoy my relationships and situations.

Oftentimes people explain a car breaking, a person dying, a chance meeting of someone new or old and other events that present us with unexpected situations or challenges as “God’s Will”. I don’t. To me, these occurrences are the result of nature or science interacting in some physical or chemical condition that defies human explanation. The universe is composed of some matter constantly intermingling with other matter causing action that results in events, of which we have no control. It is the result of a “Power Greater Than Ourselves”. It may be random or it may be pre-ordained. Whatever, the challenge for us is what we do with it and for me that is my relationship with “God’s Will”.

My Higher Power is a loving and forgiving Force in the Universe that is not concerned with who lives or dies, or who has an accident and who doesn’t. It has created a Powerful Positive Force for all to tap into and trust. We, Human Beings, have to accept that our control is limited to our behavior in the face of conditions in our lives; we can’t control the conditions, only what we do with them. We have a choice to behave positively or negatively; the situations we are presented with are not in our control.

It all happens for our good.

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Spiritually Responding To Terror

There is a book I read  that helps direct me on a path of enlarging my spiritual life. It includes spiritual directions on how to achieve holiness and closeness to my Higher Power. Within it lie the secrets and the prescription for spiritual continuity. If I am to survive and live along my spiritual path I must have values and goals — a direction and a meaning. I can learn much about my personal growth and destiny.

Two explosions went off near the finish line of the Boston Marathon on Monday killing three people and injuring over a hundred.

Within an hour of the explosions, NY police sent extra security to landmarks and the White House was placed on lock down. The Boston marathon has been run since 1897 on Patriots Day, the third Monday in April. Thousands of spectators were at the event along with 27,000 runners.

President Obama made a brief statement at the White House after sending his thoughts and prayers to the victims: “We still don’t know who did this or why but make no mistake. We will get to the bottom of this. We will find out who did this. We will find out why they did this. Any responsible group will feel the full weight of justice.”

As major cities around the country raised security alerts, and the Boston police continued to search the streets for possible undetected explosives, Americans waited to hear information.

Here are four ways I believe we can respond to terror, and stay within the path of our spiritual growth:

1. Separate idealism from destruction. Many of us wonder: Why would someone plant bombs at a marathon finish line? What ideals were at stake? But it isn’t really relevant what the motivation of the terrorist was because while terrorists may declare their ideals, the only real goal of any terrorist is to destroy. Lives. Families. Societies. Acts of terror are carried out purposefully, in cold-blooded, calculated fashion. The declared goals of the terrorist may change from place to place. He supposedly fights to remedy wrongs-social, religious, national, and racial. But for all these problems his only solution is the demolition of the whole structure of society. No partial solution, not even the total redressing of the grievance he complains of, will satisfy him- until our social system is destroyed or delivered into his hands.”

2. Pray. Say a prayer not only for the victims and their families but also for mankind. We are living in a generation when these attacks have become so common; some of us don’t even pause when we hear the latest news. Let’s stop. Think about those who were killed, who lost limbs, who lost any sense of normalcy and security. When we pray we are not only asking God to heal those who are injured, we are also sensitizing ourselves to share the burden of others in whatever way we can. Even if it’s just a moment of silence or a few sentences that we whisper to ourselves, it helps.

3. Help. Even for those of us who don’t live in Boston, there are ways to help. We can send a card or a gift basket to the injured victims in the hospital or to their families. Or get involved in organizations that help terror victims and their families. Do something even if it’s just writing an email or tweet of support and comfort for the victims. Being proactive helps us to regain our hope and sanity.

4.Gratitude. We need to treat each day as a gift. Appreciate what we have today. Our families, our friends, our health and our peace.

If we are to grow from this and enlarge our spirituality it is not enough to keep on the same level that you were on the previous day. Rather, each day should be a climb higher than the day before. When difficult tests come our way, we might not always appreciate them. The only way to keep on elevating our self is to keep passing more and more difficult life-tests. View every difficulty as a means of elevating ourselves by applying the appropriate spiritual principles. At the end of each day, we ask ourselves, “What did I do today to elevate myself a little higher?” If you cannot find an answer, ask yourself, “What can I plan to do tomorrow to elevate myself?”

May Our Higher Power give us the courage and the strength to help each other up and face yesterday’s brokenness together.

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At Home

That “at home” feeling is a funny emotion, truly hard to explain. It is more than an address or a location on a map, much more than a zip code. A decorator cannot help us create it; no more than a builder can help us build it. Feeling at home is real serenity, it is a sense of being at peace; comfortable with self and others. It’s a cozy uncomplicated feeling. What’s odd about it is as much as I searched for it, trying to create it externally, it eluded me. Life always seemed well as it was lived by others-who seemed richer or even wiser, who had more things, more status, more influence in the community. I had to stop searching outside my self.

Home is not where I make it-but what I make it. Home is when I make peace with who I was as much as whom I am. Home is whenever and wherever I let God transform my life. God dwells wherever I invite God to dwell. If I make God feel at home in my life; then I’ll feel at home in it anywhere.

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Reach Out and Touch Someone…

by Dan Griffin                                                                                                                                                                   Website Link: http://dangriffin.com/

Remember that device people used a long time ago to communicate? I am trying to remember what it is called. Oh right, the telephone. Yes, that vestige from our grandparents’ generation before email, tweeting, IMing, and, of course, sexting. Back in a simpler time. I still remember the rotary phone! The first cordless phone.
Anywho….
I have been doing this dance of recovery for some time now. Can you be an old-timer at the age of 40? LOL. We think not! But I have learned some things. Mostly, I seem to keep relearning some of the same lessons. Over and over.
Sometimes recovery is a slow dance. Sometimes it feels like the Lambada. Other times, maybe the chicken dance. You get my point. It ebbs and flows. But there are some aspects of recovery that have never changed over the eighteen years of my sobriety. One of those essential aspects has been my need for other people to help me navigate the changing music. And even to help me know the best dance – to dance.
Yet, I still find it hard to pick up the phone. Ego, mostly. My deep training as a man. I don’t want to ask for help. I definitely don’t want to have to ask for help. Like working out, I always feel better after I do it. But I have to do it!
You might think after eighteen years it wouldn’t be so hard to ask for help. To reach out. But that is not the case. That is simply not the case. In my mind it is still a sign of weakness – but not in my heart. I know that is not true. And I am not alone. I know many men who have the same challenges. We put on a good front and talk a good talk but when it comes down to getting support. It’s tough. It feels so….unmanly.
And, there is something very special about picking up the phone. Reaching out. Making a connection that is person to person. Of course, face to face is even better but when you are constantly traveling the phone is a very important tool. Sure I can find a local place where mutual friends hang out – also called “a meeting.” But sometimes I need more. I need the men who know me. Who have seen all of me. Who can call me on my shit.
It is amazing how insidious it can be. The gradual pulling away. The subtle retreat, dipping my feet into the waters of isolation and even sometimes going up to my knees. And so I am relearning the lesson. The importance of making a contact every day. Even if only for one minute. Or leaving a voicemail that speaks the whole truth and picking up the phone when the man calls back – instead of pretending that I am not by the phone as I stare at the name on the screen of my phone.
AT&T coverage may suck all over the country but they got one thing right a long time ago: there is something magical that happens when we reach out and touch someone. And that magic never dies, no matter how old you are or how many times you have done it before.

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Our Legacy Passed Along

Edited from http://www.aish.com/print/?contentID=198667681&section=/h/pes/t/g

A Passover letter to my child

My dear child,

It is now a quiet moment late at night. After an exhausting day of preparation for the Passover Seder, and I am sitting here with a pile of haggadas, preparing for Seder night. Somehow the words never come out the way I want them to, and the Seder evening is always unpredictable. But so many thoughts and feelings are welling up in my mind and I want to share them with you. These are the words I mean to say at the Seder.

When you will see me at the Seder dressed in a kittel, the same plain white garment worn on our Day Of Atonement, your first question will be, “Why are you dressed like this?”

Not because it is a day of reckoning. You see, each one of us has a double role. First and foremost we are human beings, creatures in the image of God, and on the Day of Atonement we are examined if indeed we are worthy of that title. But we are also components of our community, the Jewish People, links in a chain that started over 3,000 years ago and will make it to the finish line of the end of times. It is a relay race where a torch is passed on through all the ages, and it is our charge, to take it from the one before and pass it on to the one after. Tonight we are charged with receiving our tradition and passing it on.

“It is now 3,300 years since we received that freedom in Egypt. If we imagine the average age of having a child to be about 25 years of age, there are four generations each century. That means there is a total of 132 people stretching from our forefathers in Egypt to us today. 132 people had to pass on this heritage flawlessly, with a devotion and single-mindedness that could not falter. Who were these 133 parents of mine?

They were each with their own story. Each with their own test of faith. And each with one overriding and burning desire: that this legacy be passed unscathed to me. And one request of me: that I pass this on to you, my sweet child.

What is this treasure that they have given their lives for? What is in this precious packet that 132 generations have given up everything for?

It is a great secret: That man is capable of being a lot more than an intelligent primate. That the truth of a Higher Power does not depend on public approval, and no matter how many people jeer at you, truth never changes. That the quality of life is not measured by goods but by the good. That one can be powerfully hungry, and yet one can forgo eating. That a penny that is not mine is not mine, no matter the temptation or rationalization. That family bonding is a lot more than birthday parties; it is a commitment of loyalty that does not buckle in a moment of craving or lust.

This is our precious secret, and it is our charge to live it and to become a shining display of “This is what it means to live with a Higher Power”

132 people have sat Seder night after Seder night, year after year, and with every fiber of their heart and soul have made sure that this treasure would become mine and yours. Doubters have risen who are busy sifting the sands of the Sinai trying to find some dried out bones as residues of my great great grandfather. They are looking in the wrong place. The residue is in the soul of every one of these 132 grandfathers/granmothers whose entirety of life was wrapped up in the preservation of this memory and treasure. It is unthinkable that a message borne with such fervor and intensity, against such challenges and odds, is the result of a vague legend or the fantasy of an idle mind.

I am the 133rd person in this holy chain. At times I doubt if I am passing it on well enough. I try hard, but it is hard not to quiver when you are on the vertical shoulders of 132 people, begging you not to disappoint them by toppling everyone with you swaying in the wind.

My dear child, may God grant us many long and happy years together. But one day, in the distant future, I’ll be dressed in a kittel again as they prepare me for my burial. Try to remember that this is the treasure that I have passed on to you. And then it will be your turn, you will be the 134th with the sacred duty to pass on our legacy to number 135.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable to you my Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer

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A Spiritual Guide

One of the most misunderstood events in the Bible is the sin of the Golden Calf. Taken at face value, it is difficult to comprehend how the same people who had witnessed the miracles of the Exodus and the Revelation at Sinai could be led to worship a molten image. However, a deeper understanding of the episode reveals that the people did not intend to replace God with the Golden Calf. What they were looking for was a substitute for Moses. As the verse states, the debacle began “when the people saw that Moses was late in coming down from the mountain….”

Moses, a human being of flesh and blood, represented the people’s tangible connection to God. As Moses related, “I was standing between God and you at the time [of the Revelation at Sinai]….” Although it was God who redeemed the people from Egypt and gave them the Commandments at Sinai, it was Moses who served as the visible spiritual guide through which God brought about these wonders. Without Moses to facilitate their relationship with God, the people were in a quandary and sought to replace him.

Their mistake was that when they thought that they had lost their appointed guide, they took it upon themselves to choose their own way of connecting. Tradition relates various reasons why the likeness of a calf was selected for this purpose, but one explanation is that the people were interested in having a connection that they could make into their own beast of burden. The image of a domesticated animal symbolized a guide that could be manipulated and controlled. Moses made demands of the people; when necessary, he rebuked them. A docile calf would do no such thing.

A cornerstone of spirituality is our willingness to be receptive to a message when the Almighty speaks to us. One of the ways that we seek knowledge of God’s will for us is by having a guide. While they are not a prophet nor is he or she infallible, a spiritual guide is, however, one of the best means we have for finding clarity on all aspects of our lives, great and small.
Having a guide whom we can manipulate or order around is hardly in the spirit of the basic humility requisite for spirituality. Neither is it consistent with the acceptance that we do not always know what is best for us and that we need to always remain open, receptive and teachable.

Having a spiritual guide means being willing to take direction, not give it. Whether our guide is always right is beside the point. What is relevant is that when we get out of our own heads long enough to truly listen to someone else, we may be able to hear the voice of God.

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Addiction and Choice

I have become amazed before I am half way through my amends; I now know a new freedom and happiness. I do not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it. I do have a considerable amount of wreckage in my past that I cannot change, and if I spend the rest of my life making amends then I am good with it. This is not a request for pity; I made bad choices, for whatever reason, and the consequences are mine. The point is that I enjoy my life now and look forward to a loving my family and being of service to my community.

Just the other night I was answering the phones for our local Intergroup and received a call from a young woman who said she couldn’t drink anymore and wanted help. The opportunity to extend the hand of recovery and give someone hope was put before me. I asked her if she had been drinking and if she was drunk, to determine on what level to approach her. She sounded coherent and said she was sober. We spoke about not drinking tonight or tomorrow and going to a meeting the next evening. The rest of our conversation was about her desire to stop drinking and how grateful she was that she wouldn’t be judged.

About five minutes after we ended our conversation. Within five minutes she called back to tell me that she wanted to be honest with me and she had been drinking. We talked about the importance of her telling on herself, that honesty was the beginning of recovery. I offered to call a woman I knew in recovery to talk with her more. She said that would be helpful. I called a friend who had volunteered to be available for women in need. My friend was overwhelmed with the connection of spirituality shared by the circumstances of our three lives coming together at that moment. She had been grieving the death of her mother and praying to God for guidance to be of service to someone else in need. A connection with our Higher Power opened all three of us to an experience that is in the Fourth Dimension.

My choice was to be of service that night to my community, without any expectation of what was in store for me or anyone else. It is these new choices I make that keep me in recovery. Addiction was not a choice. I did not take my first drink and make a choice to be addicted. In fact I denied that I was addicted for almost 45 years. There is a craving that exists in the minds of addicts that is not curable. But there is a spiritual solution that can create a way of living for the addict; it stops the pain to him/herself. It requires better choices and constant vigilance, and an acceptance of being powerless. The physical obsession to consume more mood altering substances is cunning, baffling and patient. It leads to an emotional stagnation of maturity and a bankruptcy of the soul. Most addicts do not recover; they end up dead or institutionalized.

We do not ask for sympathy or to be excused of our behavior. We can make changes in our lives that lead to us being productive members of society. Addiction is something the addict must come to grips with and want to make changes; it cannot be legislated or moralized away. If we don’t want help we will use again. Understanding that does not mean condoning it, but it does mean offering help and compassion.

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    This Blog is about our primary purpose, “Our primary purpose is to stay sober and help others achieve sobriety”.

    It is my belief that the retelling of our experiences, what we have leaned from them and how we have changed our lives in recovery is key to helping others.

    If I can borrow from someone else, “I can tell you things that I have come to believe with every fiber of my being, and you can disagree with every syllable I utter, and yet both of us can be sober...both of us can be useful, productive members, not only of Alcoholics Anonymous, but of society. So, if anything I say bothers you, just dismiss it. If anything I say you disagree with, you're entitled to.”

    ……nobody speaks officially for the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous, not even the founders.”

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